SUCCESS IN 2017: STEP FIVE

We're now in the fifth and final week of what I hope has been a really helpful toolkit to enable you to see great success in 2017. We've looked at our thoughts and rituals, our roles and goals, and now we're landing on the ultimate challenge. Once you've done the other things, doing this final step will act like the final spinning cog of an elaborate mechanism, unlocking potential you perhaps didn't even know was there.

Get excited!

A lot's been said over the past couple of decades about the power of a positive mindset. It's easy to get cynical about that sort of thing, but looking back at what we've achieved over the past few weeks, surely we can know that success is possible.

And that should get us excited in the morning.

And if we're excited in the morning, we'll respond more positively to what life throws at us.

So...get excited every morning! Spend a couple of minutes every morning, thanking God for everything he's going to do for you and through you to others today.

Don't allow circumstances to define your positive outlook. Allow your positive outlook to influence your circumstances.

Get scared!

You might be afraid of spiders, you might be afraid of talking to someone really senior in your office, you might be afraid of what people will think if you bring in a packed lunch, or you might be afraid of how awkward the conversation would be if you invited a homeless person out for lunch.

It's easy to be afraid of things - life is full of unknowns, and negative results are a possibility...but let me tell you one thing for free:

Fear solves nothing.

Being afraid has a negative effect on you personally, and doesn't change the situation at all. So here's a good thing to do. Every day, do one thing that scares you. Once you've done it, no worries - no need to do anything scary until tomorrow. But don't let a day go by without scaring yourself on purpose.

Just see what happens!

Get focussed!

I don't know about you, but my life seems to get full to the brim of...stuff. Meetings, emails, tube delays, meals...and how much of it actually makes a difference in life?

You often hear of the 80/20 rule in business, where 80% of your effort leads to 20% of your results, and vice versa. What would happen if you worked out what your 20% was, and focussed as much attention as possible on that?

Go on, write a list. What are the top ten things that make a difference in your life? Now, prioritise those over everything else, no matter the sacrifice - it may annoy people at first, and you might experience some setbacks, but 80% beats 20% every day.

Thank you so much

I hope you've really enjoyed this little series with me, and I hope it's made a genuine difference to you.

I said in the opening post that I'm convinced that contentedness is a great state of mind to have. I truly believe that, and I believe you can be contented but still push for change, because my contentedness comes from a place outside of my life - and his name is Jesus.

THE MOVE FROM SNAKE TO SMARTPHONE, AND WHAT THAT MEANS FOR YOUR FUTURE

We did not have a home telephone at all until I was about 9 years old. If I wanted to communicate with people, I wrote them a letter!

I clearly remember when we moved house, and the new place had a phone line. I was taught by my parents that when I answered the telephone to clearly say:

• my name
• our phone number
• "how can I help you?"

I was one of three boys that used to run to the sound of the phone...who is it and what do they want!

Things gradually changed.

The spinning numbers were replaced by push buttons.

The phone directory that I used to try and rip up with my bare hands when the new one arrived was replaced by the internet.

What had once been hugely thrilling can now feel intrusive. I got an answerphone so that we did not have to take calls during family mealtimes...but it also took calls at other times, and just created a list of people for me to phone back.

I was given a mobile phone when I was almost 30 years old.

The brick that I carried round could call anyone anywhere, and if I was bored I could even play ‘snake’ on it.

Freedom.

I was no longer tied to only talking to people when at home.

I didn't have to wait for the phone when someone else was using it.

The call was always for me!

This week I finally got rid of my landline.

Nobody ever seemed to call (apart from cold calls seeing if I'd been miss-sold PPI) and nobody in the house ever bothered to answer it.

But more importantly...

My smartphone can now do everything!

• I no longer use a separate camera - I can take pictures with my phone
• I can spend and move my money so do not need to visit the bank
• I can have spoken directions via Google Maps, so no longer need a London A-Z
• I have not needed to buy my kids a set of encyclopedias, as they can look up information with a swipe of a finger

For many, ‘change is considered loss’, but as 2016 comes to an end and 2017 beckons, I want to look forward optimistically.

I wonder what new things will come and how life will change into the future...and I wonder what you will do differently in 2017!

THE DANGER OF POSITIVE THINKING

I heard a radio discussion on the flaws of positive thinking and the false hope that accompanies it:

False hope binds us to unliveable situations and blinds us to real possibilities. In contrast, a healthy uneasiness with the status quo prompts the exploration of alternatives. (The Power of Negative Thinking, Radio 4)

He went on to say:

We use the word hope for situations over which we have no agency.  We don't hope to eat.  We do it.  In contrast, we would hope that the plane doesn't crash."

It follows then, that next time I find myself hoping something will be okay, it's wise to take it as a prompt to ask:

Do I really have no agency over the situation?  Or can I get up and impact the status quo? 

What they were saying was that positive thinking as an alternative to taking action is not positive at all. Believing I am powerless when I'm not is negative.

For example, I wouldn't stand over a heart attack victim with car keys in hand, saying 'I hope you get to hospital'. I'd act. Instead of thinking to myself, 'I hope that poor man finds somewhere to stay this Christmas,' I can support a charity like Shelter.

Hope alone can be unhealthy if it blinds us to what we can do to make a change.

In contrast, sometimes hope is an appropriate acknowledgement that we can't effect change and shouldn't waste energy worrying. Once I've chosen to get on that plane, I can't effect its ability to stay in the air.  So hope alone in a situation that is outside my control might be appropriate. 

But I have a proposal.

Add to hope a dose of trust, and you have a more potent force, bringing peace.

Let me explain.

Acknowledging situations in which you really don't have agency and in which you are reliant on another (e.g. the designer of the plane and the pilot) is a rational response. If the object of your trust is worthy of that trust, your hope is well-founded and brings peace of mind. Instead of worrying about stuff that you cannot change, you have more headspace to instead focus on those things that you can change.

You can probably see where I'm going with this.

Romans 15:13 reads: 'May the God of Hope fill you with all Joy and Peace as you Trust in him, so that you may overflow with Hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.' 

A trustworthy God in whom we hope brings peace and joy.

Hold that thought in balance with James 1:27 where we read: 'Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.'  This is an admonishment to act.

To realise the truth in both these passages we need discernment to recognise when to trust, and when to act.

For example:

My mother is suffering from vascular dementia.  My sisters and I hope and trust that God will continue to give her peace and will care for her.  Equally, we acted to buy a tracker for her keyring so we know where she is, and between us we spend time with her to ensure she takes her medication and that she eats regularly.

So we act to meet her needs rather than sit back and hope God will step in.  Meanwhile, the overflow of hope and trust we have in God empowers us and my mother.

We do not walk with blind faith. We walk with eyes wide open to the hope that is founded on God's grace toward us, while actively looking for opportunities to act.

So here's my challenge to you.

Sit and think this Christmas season. What issues are preying on your mind?  Where will you place your Hope? On a new year resolution? On the lottery? On your ability to think positively?

Or in a trustworthy God?

You can choose to trust. So act now. You'll find fellow travellers at Ealing Town Hall any Sunday morning.