GOODBYE, REDEEMER CHURCH LONDON

Dear Redeemer,

I've never learned so much.

The last 18 months I have been surrounded by the energy and pace of Redeemer Church London. I’ve seen everything behind the scenes; the hard work, the passionate hearts and all the fun! From leaflets to videos, from the prayer ministry to the connections team, from organising huge events like Carols to just having a coffee with one of God’s precious kids. It’s been a blast.

I’ve never seen a Church that has such a urgency to reach out; Redeemer is hungry to impact people, to grow, host and bring others into a relationship with Jesus. The events like Little Fish, Carols, the Running Meet-up and an all year round Alpha aren’t just for fun - they are all charged by the desire to show people that Jesus is for you and wants to live in your heart. This church provides such a warm, welcoming open door to those who have never experienced Jesus before.

There is a rich foundation of community and love amongst the people of Redeemer that just oozes family. There is a solid bridge between the diverse generations and a beautiful mix of cultures and ethnicities that feels like peace, sounds like a friend and surely is a taste of heaven.

Megan and I have felt part of something huge, something that has a long and strong destiny. At only five years old I just know that Redeemer has loads more in store, this is merely the beginning. 

Some of my own highlights from the last year and a half:

• Leading the ‘Activating a Supernatural Culture’ Meetup in our living room, developing deep relationships that we will never forget.
• Preaching my first ever sermon about my story and how God speaks.
• The giant temporary office at Exchange Plaza! Hilarious space given to us by God.
• Learning from Pete and the Advance Church Planting team down in Cornwall for a week.
• Organising the 2018 Carols; a beautiful looking, great sounding event despite the busy period.
• Baptising so many, including my friends Mak, Sunny and Brooksy.
• Moving the Redeemer staff into the new office on Bond Street - pop in for a cup of tea with Pete and Rach anytime! I love those guys!

Of course there is loads loads more. But my true number one highlight is the time I’ve spent doing life with my brothers in Christ - I’ve got to know them so well, prayed with them, cried with them and journeyed with them. We’ve taken huge steps toward the heart of the Father and learn’t about who we are in Christ, that’s called church. Thanks lads, you know who you are!

Finally I just want to thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for being so lovely, so kind, so full of the joy of Jesus. Pursue that intimate, raw and vulnerable relationship with your best friend, Holy Spirit. Walk closely with each other as you do, share the blessings and share the struggles, hug each other and feed each other. Shine like Jesus shines.

Let’s go change the world,

Joseph x

To follow what Joseph and Megan get up to as they move to Brighton subscribe here: www.youtube.com/josephthedreamer

DEPRESSION & TEENAGERS

As teens we go through a lot, we’re a lot more emotional and there will be a lot of bumpy roads ahead and there will be times where we will hit rock bottom and think that there’s no way out. There is always a way out.

I’ve been through many many struggles and it’s gotten to the point of self harming and also attempting to take my life. Fortunately, I’m still here. I’m so thankful that I am because I’ve met incredible people along the way and my life has gotten better compared to how it used to be. If you’re going through depression or self harm then, please know that you are LOVED & BEAUTIFUL! You don’t deserve to go through this pain. Just know it is temporary and things will get better. When I was depressed and I was self harming, I wanted to isolate myself and stay away from people but I knew doing that would make me feel a lot worse. I was bottling up so much and at that point I had to speak to someone. I did reach out to family and that’s including my church family too. I was speaking out to people who I trusted and felt comfortable around. Doing this lifted a lot of weight off my shoulders. Even though I was still hurting, I felt a lot more lighter and felt like I had nothing to hide anymore.

Also, I am a strong believer in Christ and praying daily and pouring my heart to him is something that helps me incredibly. Not only did things start getting better as time went on but I built such a close relationship with God and knowing that with him anything is possible is very reassuring. As I mentioned before, life will get better, you just have to have hope. There will of course be obstacles and things will try and bring you down but that’s how the devil works. We just need to stop backing away from God and remove whatever is blocking your way to chase God. He’s opening new doors for you, he has a plan for you (which is even quoted in the bible) “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” - Jeremiah 29:11.

So, this is what I have to say to anyone who may be going through a tough time and if you’re bottling your emotions up then, it’s best to speak out to someone you are comfortable with. I promise you, you will feel a lot more better because you’re finally letting everything out. Speaking to someone may sound lame but it’s so helpful. Another thing to do is distract yourself. You can chill with your mates, watch a movie, go shopping.. Just do something that will help take your mind off the negative thoughts. For me personally, hanging out with my mates helps take my mind off anything bad that might be going on. It’s because i’m surrounded with people I know who care and who I’m happy being around. That’s another thing, surround yourself with positive people, that’s key. It makes such a big difference.

It may seem like you’re getting nowhere in life and you’re giving up but God will open doors for you. You just need to pray about it and have faith. This feeling of hopelessness, loneliness, sadness etc will pass and you will find yourself walking on the right path again.

Talk to people, pray about it and try keep your head up! ♡

Lyds x

I'M NOT MOVING

I'm listening to news reports of a cabinet reshuffle not going to plan and the speculation about power struggles behind the scenes. 

Sometimes we dig our heels in and get our own way.  Sometimes we stand strong and find ourselves forcibly moved. 

When were thinking of making a stand, we need to make a judgement call whether we are willing to accept the possible consequences of our stance.  

Are you ready to lose your [job, friendship, advantage, stake - insert here] for the sake of principle, for the prospect of gain?  Is this important enough for you?

It's easy to understand why some (most?) take the path of least resistance.  Least risk. Least pain. Least soul-searching.

But some things are not negotiable.  Some things are worth fighting for.

Friends.
Family.
Faith.

Acts 4 sets out an account of A situation where Peter and John had to decide whether to obey the authorities and to stop speaking about Jesus or to continue to speak openly about what they knew to be true.  It was a no-brainer:
"Which is right in God’s eyes: to listen to you, or to him? You be the judges! As for us, we cannot help speaking about what we have seen and heard.”

This was no easy thing - there were significant consequences for taking their stance.  

So ask yourself: what's important enough for you to take a stand?  How will you respond when it's put to the test?

Standing strong is easier with like-minded people to support you.  Find out more at Redeemer on any given Sunday morning at Ealing Town Hall. 

We'll stand with you. 

THREE WAYS TO CHILL WHEN YOU'RE STRESSED

If you talked to me a month ago you would have discovered quite quickly that I was stressed.

My mum was in hospital, soon to move to nursing care. We were selling her house. Work involved more projects with fewer staff. This year's pay round left a lot of us frustrated. The house needed attention. My kids were stressed with dissertation deadlines. My dog is 15 and showing signs of decline. I've put on far too much weight. I think I've developed RSI in my mouse arm.

What can I do?

Psalm 131 gives me a three step plan.

1. KNOW YOUR LIMITATIONS

Verse 1: My heart is not proud, Lord, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me.

2. STOP AND CHILL

Verse 2: But I have calmed and quieted myself, I am like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child I am content.

3. PLACE YOUR TRUST IN GOD

Verse 3:  Israel, put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore.

Join me while we face this together.

A POEM FOR CHRISTMAS

Christmas can be a time
When families get together:
Young children scream, wine glasses gleam,
Both ready for M&S dinner.

TV's in the corner
Rerunning Home Alone,
Heart Radio's in the kitchen,
Chris Rea's driving home, 
Again.

Toddlers find the wrapping
More engaging than the Duplo
Teen couples find the company
Less of interest than their own.

The dog's confused and excited
With so many different sources
Of scratches and pats, he can't relax,
His whining is remorseless.

Christmas can be a time
When families are missed,
The parcel made last post
Winging off to little sis.

Skype will come in handy
To laugh across the miles,
The screen will mask the tears
And focus on the smiles.

Gran will talk of Christmas past
When everyone was home
'Cept in Gulf War 1 when Uncle John
Went away, ....

Christmas can be a time
When budgets get stretched tight,
Cash pressures get to breaking point
And prompt senseless fights.

Some focus on opportunity
To spend some gilt-free money,
The only prayers are for extra hours
And a faster Tesco trolley.

For others it's simply 'Yuletide'
An excessive celebration,
A winter feast, all you can eat,
Give in to all temptation.

Most focus on the family,
Even more on the gifts;
There's little time for Jesus
Assigned amongst the myths.

Some do remember Jesus
From half-forgotten carols,
They know there's something more
Than donkeys and angel heralds.

For there He is in the middle,
Noticed once in a while;
It's His birthday, but all He's getting
Is a half-hearted song and a smile.

He's no longer a babe in a manger,
He's now a resurrected King,
Waiting for those who would worship
To stand and welcome Him in.

Whatever your experience of Christmas
You can come just as you are,
His love is unconditional
He'll accept you warts and all.

So come on!
It’s a season to celebrate!
To dance, to sing and to shout!
Your Saviour invites you to join Him,
So when you sing this Christmas,
BELT it out.

A poem inspired by warm homes

I really value the warmth of the homes that welcomed me in as a teenager. The families that made a conscious effort to open their homes and their families to friends of their children. I learned a lot from them about priorities and the importance of nurturing an instinct for inclusion. I still value invites to share everyday stuff with friends.

This poem is written in acknowledgement of the families who extended their homes to me and my friends. Thank you.

---

Home from Home

Step over the threshold
And through the front hall
Full of shoes and possibilities.
Come to a kitchen table
Where you are able
To shed the cold and to unroll your soul
Against its worn and warm knots, 
Flavoured with cookies and coffee mugs
And echoes of late chats and early plans
And sneak-behind hugs.
Let the love that pools here
Soak into your marrow
Put aside tomorrow
And so launder your heart clean of fear.
Our home is your home,
Come pull up your chair.

---

Here's a challenge for you.

This week, find an opportunity to offer a welcoming inclusion to someone outside your family. It may be an invite to a family meal, a trip to the cinema, or even a trip to IKEA (other furniture stores are also available).

Be a model of inclusion.

Here's an invitation to you.

Come along to Ealing Town Hall at 10am this Sunday morning, where you'll find a welcome from the family at Redeemer.

FATHER IS A VERB

We're community, and the community works best with strong relationships. It can be tempting to live life with the mantra "Family first", to put me and mine before those I rub shoulders with daily. But that path deprives us of community. I was fortunate to have strong role models around me outside my immediate family to supplement the parenting I got at home.  That helped mould me as a person.

I now live as part of a local community in Ealing and as part of a church community called Redeemer.  I'm thankful that I still benefit from the support and friendship of those I worship with.

One aspect of this is benefiting from the fatherly care of my pastor and people like him.

The poem that follows celebrates this fathering I've received over the years, from older cousins, mentors, friends and pastors.  And from my late dad, the 'Honey Monster'.

(With great thanks to Godfrey Rust, who wrote a wonderful poem called 'Church is a verb'.)

Father is a verb.

Father's Day; and
Father Christmas
have tried to convince us,
but don't be fooled:
You can, may or will father,
depending on your mood.
For father is a verb.

It only works in the transitive;
you can't father alone,
only in relationship.

It doesn't resent hospital trips,
and offers wrap-around comfort
when a partnership
splits.

It's touch-line volume
drowns out all rivals.
And belly laughs come standard
with jokes on recycle.
Yes, father is a verb.

It's something that men do,
despite the hour,
it drives right on through
the night when life’s gone sour.
It'll hammer ten finger nails
to get the job done.

It will dance, heedless of decorum
forgetting reputation
(- with an ill-suited hat on).

It turns manliness
into awesome-men-ness,
it tempers strength
with a dose of gentleness. Yes,
father is a verb.

It works in the singular:
I can father;
you can father
      (I'm not talking sex here;
      that takes a partner.)
It works in the plural:
we can father; and
they can father, because,
you see, in this village
it's an joint activity,
we father (and mother)
collaboratively.

It works best in the present tense,
happening now, not "LATER!"
-
It can be said in a gentle voice
or something - even - quieter;

sometimes active: directive, protecting;
but often responsive: just sitting, listening;
...holding and hugging;
it responds to need, you see,
but works best
proactively,
works great
sacrificially.

For example,

though it cost him dearly,
God Fathers us
and through us daily.
And one day, suit pressed,
He'll proudly walk
with the bride of Christ.
And as Father of the bride,
He'll host the party and blow the price;

(- BIGGEST - bar-bill - EVER)

And we'll be sure to save at least one dance
for Father.

Oh yes, you heard:
Father is a verb.

If you are looking for community, you'll find it at Redeemer.  Come and introduce yourself.

FIVE LESSONS I LEARNED IN MIAMI

I need a holiday!

We all say that at some point in life, don't we?

My husband Mark loves to travel.

Before we got together he had already travelled half the world, and I feel like I've travelled the other half since marrying him.

I'm so privileged to have been able to travel around a lot of England and Wales - I love the UK and would quite happily take all of my holiday exploring villages, coastlines and cities...but having kids hasn't stopped Mark wanting to explore what our stunning, God-created world has to offer.

My maternity leave has just come to an end.

Mark and I thought it would be great to make the most of my final days at home and take the boys on holiday - not least because school holiday prices are horrendous!

Our next decision: Where do we go?

Mark is an adventurous man, so said:

Argentina! The boys will love it, and we can get a camper van!

We actually spent some time travelling around New Zealand in a camper van on my last maternity leave.

As much fun as I am sure that would have been, I declined.

Two boys under three in a confined camper van exploring a country where we don't speak the language? Thanks, but no thanks!

We went to Dubai with both boys in February and had a great time.

Hot weather, city, beach ticked all the boxes for us.

So we decided to go to Miami, Florida.

The flight was almost 9 hours each way with a 5 hour time difference to the UK.

Jet lag + sleepless nights + long-distance travelling + toddlers might not be everyone's idea of fun!

We spent two days in Orlando visiting Disney parks, which isn't very long. Most people go for at least two weeks and visit all the parks. Both were great, and Levi fulfilled his dream of meeting Buzz Lightyear!

Zachary was none the wiser, but he's mastered the art of crawling, so it's a good job we didn't go with the camper van idea!

We then spent a week on the beach in Miami.

Sand, sun, swimming pools, ice creams, cocktails...bliss!

But Mark and I couldn't sit still for a whole week, so we did a few road trips, one of which involved seeing wild alligators!

We all had a great time and were glad to spend some quality family time together.

So, here you go. My five things for you to take away.

1. Travel
   Explore the world, the country, or even just the town you live in! Walk a different way home from the station - you may find a hidden gem in your local area you never knew was there.
2. Do "Your Thing"
   Mark would say: "Travelling is my thing"! What is your thing? Do it and enjoy it!
3. Create memories
   Be around the ones you love - family and friends - and share life together. Take photos to look back on when you're older.
4. Be thankful
   I'm so grateful for my privileged life. I need to remember to thank Jesus more for what he has blessed me with - a good job, money and the chance to go on holiday.
5. Love being local!
   Enjoy your surroundings, the people around you and what Ealing has to offer.

THE SIX BIGGEST THINGS I MISS ABOUT MY DAUGHTER

I wonder how many of us in Ealing are living here whilst family members are living miles away?

It can be a challenge not seeing our loved ones, despite technology helping us keep in touch.

This year my daughter is doing a gap year in Uganda -  over 4,000 miles away. She left England in October and will not be back until July - 9 months later! The longest she had ever been away until now was one week, so 9 months feels like a really long time!

She is volunteering for Smile International which has involved:

• teaching in a local school
• helping with their hospital ministry
• supporting families
• helping to run outreach events through the church they are partnering with.

I am so proud of what she is doing and how she is coping living away from home - not only shopping and cooking for herself and others, finding her way around and making new friends, but also washing her own clothes by hand!

She moaned about having to use the washing machine to wash her own stuff at home!

But even though I am proud of what she is doing I miss her loads...

I have particularly missed her at special family occasions such as Christmas, Mother's Day and my birthday but to be honest I just miss not having her around generally.

• I miss our chats in her room - often laying on her bed finding out how her day had been or telling her about mine
• I miss watching DVDs on her bed together – our favourite being The Musketeers, or a good chick flick
• I miss listening to her putting on different accents (Australian being the most cultivated one) whilst revising for exams - don't ask me why but we both used to be in stitches so it certainly livened up the revision!
• I miss her making me cups of tea – she had my exact requirements pretty mastered before she left
• I miss not being able to give her a hug and tell her I love her in person
• I miss her noise…the house is very quiet without her!

My daughter, Lois, is so full of life, energy and fun, loud and vivacious and underneath very caring, loyal and compassionate towards others.

Being a mum has been one of the best things I have had the privilege of doing. It can at times feel like a heavy investment - endless sleepless nights (both for babies and teenagers!), selfless serving, giving yourself emotionally, physically and financially, running around after them, praying for them, trying to negotiate with them, not to mention the endless washing, cooking and clearing up...but it is great to watch them as they leave home and take on responsibilities and challenges – to know that you have been a part of shaping who they have become and to realise that they are now investing in others around the world.

Are your family far away?

What do you miss about them?

I see the church as a family too – a place to belong, a place to share life with others, to make memories together, to show love and commitment, to encourage one another and be there for one another in life’s challenges.

Why not come along to Redeemer and see for yourself!

The Bible says:

God sets the lonely in families

Have you found a family in Ealing yet?

ONE FATHER'S THOUGHTS ABOUT A MOTHER ADAPTING TO A NEVER-CHANGING SON

I am the father of two adults, Amy (24) and Ethan (23). I still shout: 'Hi, kids', when I greet them. 

They don't seem to mind.

They are all grown up, working and making their own decisions about loving and living. Our relationship has changed over time, from me entertaining them, then training them, maintaining them and now relating to them as fellow adults.

It's been a challenge, but we've adapted.

And I'm still relying on my heavenly Father to show me how to best support them.

'Cos I'm still their dad.

I've been wondering what it might have been like for the parents of Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

Bringing up the Son of God as a child, as a teen and then watching him attain adulthood probably wasn't all plain sailing. How did they relate to him? We get a few glimpses in the gospels, but not many.

It's apparent that Joseph died before Jesus reached 30. Did Mary bring Jesus up on her own or did Joseph die much later, perhaps triggering the start of Jesus' travels? We don't know. We do know that Mary followed Jesus. We know she was part of the group who formed the early church, as were his brothers.

So I wonder what it was like for Mary to pray to the ascended Jesus after bringing him up - knee scrapes, adolescence and all.

How did she adapt from mother to worshipper? 

Here's how I imagine how an early prayer to Jesus from Mary might have sounded.

Mary's prayer to the ascended Jesus

O Lord, my Saviour, my spirit rejoices in you, for you...
- 
Oh, Jesus. This isn't as easy as I thought it would be. 
Oh, my son, my child, my beloved child - now my Saviour. 
My whole being worships you, and yet in my heart I still treasure those times when it was just you and me. 
Holding you close, hearing your first words, shepherding you as you took your first steps, watching over you... 
And now you watch over me. 
- 
Jesus, my heart still aches when I recall your body arched in pain, bleeding. Your cries still haunt me. It's hard to shake the image of your lifeless body
wrapped in cloth and lying - in a tomb. 
- 
Forgive me, dear son; I almost lost my mind with grief. I was blinded with my tears, and in my fear I didn't understand.  
- 
And then, when I saw you again, whole, restored...
Oh how I loved to see that smile again, to feel your arms around me once more, to hear your laughter, to draw in your warmth as we shared a meal.
Just like we used to. 
But you were taken again so soon. I know you had to go, but oh, how I missed you. 
-
But I'll tell your story - so many want to hear my story. The boys promise to write it down, but I'll still tell. It thrills me every time I tell it, for how can written words capture you, your love, your presence. 
- 
You spoke of a gift, you said that if we waited here in Jerusalem, we would be bathed in YOUR Holy Spirit. 
And now I see. 
I almost weep with joy when I hear young John and the rest of your friends
speaking in your name.
I recognise your voice, you see.  I recognise your heart, in their words. 
It's just like you're still here. 
Thank you for not leaving your old mum alone. 
I'll see you soon, my Jesus. 

How about you?

• What stage of life are your children at?
• Have they grown up and built their own lives?
• How has your relationship adapted?
• What heartaches and highs do you look back on? 
• And how about your parents - how well has your relationship with them adapted along the way?

The wonderful thing about worshipping Jesus, son of man and Son of God, is that he can relate.

Whatever stage your life is at, you can ask him to support and guide you. His Spirit is still available to those who seek Him.

WHAT TO DO WHEN FACING TOUGH FAMILY GATHERINGS

Family matters.

Most mothers and sons have a singular relationship. Some mothers dote on their son, considering him near-perfect...much to the chagrin of his sisters.

And when her husband passes away, the relationship can change, perhaps by her becoming more dependent on the son's support. It's then that it's important for roles to be clarified, and boundaries redefined.

My father, a larger than life character, died after a short illness shortly into his retirement years. I'm an only son with three sisters, and now my mother will often call me by my father's name. We laugh about it, but we both know that she still feels his absence even 16 years since he died.

I still miss him too.

Jesus' father, Joseph, doesn't get a mention in the Bible after the account of Jesus at the temple aged 12. Most assume that Joseph died at some point between then and Jesus' 30th year.

However, his mum was still around.

Mary was aware that events would one day cause her deep pain, like a sword piercing her heart, as promised when he was still a babe in arms. This didn't deter her, she stuck with him, appearing in the Bible's accounts among his followers.

We read that when he had grown up, Mary and Jesus both went to a wedding in Cana, in Galilee.

Events such as this typically lasted several days.

The bridegroom was responsible for feeding the guests, and providing wine for the duration of this community celebration. To fail to do so was shameful and might even prompt the bride's father to sue!

On this occasion the wine ran out before festivities had concluded.

You can read the account in John 2. John records the action as taking place 'on the third day'.  Here's how I imagine it:

---

On the Third Day

There was a wedding in Cana
and Mary nudged her son: 
'The wine has finished
This - is - not - good.' 
And Jesus said, 'Mum. Not now'. 
- 
And Mary said
'Listen to your mother.' 
And Jesus sighed. 
- 
And Mary told the servants, 
'Do whatever he tells you.' 
- 
Then Jesus saw that it was no use to argue. 
And he said, 'let there be water'. 
And they rolled across the stone jars in front of him. 
- 
And Jesus said, 'let there be wine'. 
And it was so - very - good. 
- 
And Mary smiled to herself
thought how much Joseph would have laughed to see this
and whispered to Jesus: 
'This just the start you know.' 
And he did,
and it was. 
- 
And there was a Mother's faith
and there were gallons of glorious wine. 
And Mary kept on smiling, so proud of her son
and of this start of his new-vintage Kingdom
with the original third day, rolled-stone, miracle. 
- 
And there was a great party, 
and loud singing
with much laughter, 
and the Son danced
with his mother through the night. 
- 
There was evening and there was morning, 
a fine Third Day. 

---

Have you experienced the loss of close family?

Do you find it harder at family gatherings?

I've found the secret of adapting and adjusting is keeping Jesus close, trusting him because he is the one person who will always be with you.

And he can work miracles in the face of everyday challenges.

Also, make the most of the family you have with you; honour those who are no longer with us by celebrating the life we have.